The Po-lice

Over Thanksgiving break, I had the great pleasure of going to my boy Zach's house in Southern CT. T'was a great house, good food, real relaxing.

However, I had to come back to school on Friday instead of Sunday for various reasons. Once I got to the station in New Haven, I had to wait for my ride. The guy picking me up is on the hoop squad and they had practice till 8 and I got into the station at 6:40.

No problem with waiting. I got a book. I got my Ipod. And I got two fully fuctional eyes.

Once I sat down on the benches I noticed three things: firstly, I read a sign saying we were on heightened alert since it was the holidays and there would be an increase of police presence. Secondly, I noticed that there were SQUAT like guys patroling the station. And lastly, there were the fake cops.

Now, I'm all cool with taking extra precaution and trying to prevent attacks. But does the increase in officers almost have the opposite affect on you sometimes? Like, the more cops you see walking around...just waiting.... makes you think something might actually happen?

I'm sitting there on the bench and can't help but stare when these cops go walking around. First, have you seen what is on their belt? I mean my goodness, they got more s*it than Batman. I don't even know how they can walk around. They got the normal cuffs and the pistol but on top of that there is a walkie talkie, can of some spray, and a beating stick amongst other things.

Oh and not to mention the absolutely GINORMOUS assault rifle that is in their hands at all times. And then you got those black boots which look like they could have taken down the Berlin Wall in one or two kicks. They go up to about their shins and look like they weigh more than what Shaq did when he was born. I don't know how they can run in those. I think Nike should make some sweet big running shoes for cops. That would make money.

So I'm just sitting there. Trying not to stare at these guys cuz I don't want them to think I'm up to something. I mean I look American. But you never know. So after one of the guys caught me looking at him. I tried to be as American as possible.

I took out my Ipod with a quickness and started bobbing my head to the music. (even though i was listening to Harry Potter on tape). Then I took out a bag of bagels Zach's mom had given me. I didn't eat them cuz I wasn't hungry (Thanksgiving leftovers earlier in the day) but I just took them out. Like a prop.

I probably took it too an extreme but you never know. Then I noticed something even more interesting that made me unable to stop staring: the fake cops.

Now you know what I'm talking about. The folks in the black thin jacket with "Security" written on the back. You usually get the ambiguous race male with or without a ponytail and/or the overweight black woman.

They will have the see through white shirt and custom movie theater employee black pants. And you might find a flashlight or their belt. You will never see a regular old person doing that job. It is exclusive to the outliers and weird people of any given community.

Seeing them almost made me want to commit a crime in front of them becauseI know I could a)outrun them and b)outsmart them. I thought about going into the Dunkin Donuts, ordering a donut and then walking out without paying and then telling them just to see their reaction.

My ride came and got me after a couple of hours and as I was leaving I took one last look at all of the law enforcement.

I realized that the police presence made me feel more and less safe at the same time.

And obviously provided some good laughs.

Who knew?